Friday 2 November 2007

Our lives is full of screen time!

Ask yourself this question.

How can I "NOT" allow my child to be fully acquainted with the electronic screen?

Oh well, what can I say. In our household, we have 2 laptops, 1 desktop, 1 big tv and a PS2, and Jnr and me is wishing for a Nintendoo DS, and PapaGecko is hoping for a Nintendo WII.

I truly believe in the idea that electronic screens is now very much part of our lives, and will continue to be a very common encounter in our future lives, especially our son.

I see the tv as a more effecient educational tool, like a singing, dancing and entertaining version of the good old paper and cover encyclopedia. And wiht all these satelites, our access to knowledge is boundariless!

And with all these advancement in technologies, like humankind sending moonbuggies out to another planet, and observing it's activity via the screen again from earth. Or that special multimillion dollar electronic arm that can be control from inside the space station, to help do all those dangerous fixing of the space station. Again, it's being controlled by an astronaut viewing a screen with a joystick on hand, and because it's so expensive, you wouldn't want someone who's got bad hand and eye coordination to handle it! The choice would be an obvious someone who's had game console experience! How about keyhole surgeries? Again, you wouldn't want a surgeon who's never been near a game console before, starts operating on you via looking at a screen, a experience totally alien to him, would you? PDA phones, self scanning cash tills, and many more.

Look around our lives now, we are never far away from an electronic screen. People working in call centers is constantly in front of a computer screen, traders in the forex exchange pit is intensely infront of thier screens, animators working on the latest Disney feature is constantly working infront of the screen, and lastly but not least, PapaGecko, in his very ordinary job of an IT consultant, is working infront of the laptop's screen, everyday. I believe our children lives will be even more drenched in electronic screens everywhere.

We adults growing up without all these technologies, finds it scary and perplexing. We're constantly asking ourselves "How does it do that?!!" "WE" are the ones who are finding all these tvs and computers scary because we had limited chance to live with them, explore them and grow with them. This concept of learning via looking at a screen is so unfamiliar, hence we don't know what damage it can do, hence best to shut it down first, before it gets worst. This is a vey natural human reflex, it's the "sense unfamilairity, lets' flee" nature way to preserve our lives.

But how can we possibly understand the characteristic of such machines and anticipate thier immense capabilities and possibilities, if we are not allow such long hours of exploring and learning of such machines? So, do we really want our kid to have this same kind of fear and uncertainty? Don't forget, our children's world will have more screens and machines than ours, so much so, we could possibly create limitations, and un-nessaccery fear in them towards such technologies. All because we adults didn't understand it, didn't want to step out of our familiar and predictable zone. Hence we weren't gonna explore it with our children. Hence it would have been so easy to just accept what everyone is saying "too much tv or computer will zombiefied our children!" "It's bad, it'll teach them all those bad thing" Well, at least it's general consensus that the tv and computer is a teaching device!

I for one, felt, it was so stupid of me to listen and agree to all these other people's saying and not actually finding out for myself, if it's really true or maybe not? So I've decided to find the truth, hence, off with the time limits and on with the games.

Well, the results is , my son binged and gorged on the PS2, including the "baddest" Grand Theft Auto, and he's now not interested in it anymore. Infact, he's now after the Nintendoo DS for that puppy training and brainiac game.

His computer skills has lead us to this scenario. My 7 yr old is so proficient with his laptop and internet and is now communicating via spelling (and learning t spell more words day by day) and typing (his typing speed is picking up!) with another Toon friend in his Disney online community. Where else his peers are still struggling to even understand how to switch on the computer, learning how to type, never mind comprehending the vast world of the internet. My child is now very aware if he wants to know anything, all he has to do is Google it! There is no limit to his need for knowledge! He still needs to be reminded about gvng his eyes and brain a rest in order not to get those bad headaches (result from sitting infront of the same screen for too long, so now he alternate between laptop and tv).

His mind is now attracted to the idea of animation and film making. He's excited abut how you can draw something in the screen, the computer animation program can make it move. But he's not necessarily interested to find out more and why and how it does that. He is aware that's the characteristic of animation program, and what it can do or cannot do (and sometimes questioning "wouldn't it be better if it can to this too?". This to me, is the emergence of a possible need to "design" something better! He can get me to video him climbing that monkey frame, down load it onto the internet for his grandma (across the world) to see. Because of our Skype chats, he's aware of how everypart of the world have different time zones, and why.

Now if these lessons is not helpful to him when he's an adult, I don't what is.

So ask yourself the same question again. How can I "NOT" allow my child to achieve his full capabilities in mastering such magnificent technologies?

Thursday 25 October 2007

What does unschooling means to me.

The other night I've managed to catch a BBC UK program called Last Chance Kids. It's basically a documentary on how certain UK schools is doing to increase the level of reading. It was really teeth grinding, nerve cringingly painful to watch the way the teachers and headteachers speak to those children. How is it possible that it's accepatable for teachers to shout at those children? There's was this kid, and he was obviously having issues, as it was blatantly stated that his father was in jail, and his mother is struggling to survive on "single parent benefit". It was obviously from this kid's language, that he was constantly swore at and it's second nature fo r him to swear at the teachers. It was obvious this kid is suffering from low self esteem, and is using this "I don't have to listen to you" and "I can swear at you" gung-ho appearance to hide his embarrassment and unhappiness at being unable to read. Nobody ask the this kid why he's misbehaving. It was obviously that with this kid, it's been agreed amongst the adults there's a "no tolerance attitude" applied towards him, everytime he misbehave. Seeing the number of times this kid been shouted at by the teacher, right across the room. The number of times of not having the chance to explained and defend why he did what he did and the immediate punishement by being ordered out of the room, in front of the whole class.

I'm not saying this can happen to my son, but then, I thinking surely it must be so unpleasant to even be in that same class, having to put up with this constant battle between the teacher's shouting and the child's kicking off his chair as he storm off to the headmistress room.

So what does unschooling means to me? Well, it meant speaking to the child, allowing the child to tell you what's going thru his mind. It meant to respect and accept that the child does have up and down feelings that is equally as important and legit as our, and is quite capable of fixing his own problems, if given the opportunities to do so.

I do realised this 11 months of unschooling has isolated me and my kid, so far away from any unpleasant and harsh world, especially school environment. Am I cotton woolling him from reality? Am I cotton woolling myself from reality? Am I hiding from facts of life? We've been hiding so long away in our unschooling bubble that it was quite a shock to our system to see reality played out on that tv screen. But yet it was only just 11 months ago, DS was in that scenario. I clearly now understand and feel his distress and can understand why he was so disturb and effected by a school environment. And that documentary only just a half hour show, already I was feeling really upset for that child, I can imagine how bad it can be for my son to be in that situation 9 - 3pm, 5 days a week?

So am I being un-real by hiding my son in these lovey dovey, fluffy, happy and nourishing world of homeschooling/ unschooling? The mantra constantly chanted in the school playground, while waiitng for our kids to come out "Yes, it's horrible, my kid's not very happy because blah blah blah...." "Well, life's hard, and they'll just have to learn" "Oh yes, I told my kid, life is unfair and he'll have to learn to acecept it" "school is all about preparing our children for future" Blah, Bah, Blah!!!

So, school is all about learning to put up with your unhappiness and get on with it, and you can do "happiness" when you're eventually big enough to rebel against your teacher! Homeschooling is also all about putting up with your unhappiness too, just in a different setting, in that you're allowed to start living your life happily, as how you want it, when you graduate "out of your parents house"

Basically, put your life on hold until you're finished memorising all those school texts!

Now, unschooling is all about learning to live your life as how you see fit, right here, right now. So that you can get it out of the way, and concentrate on the more important things like your interest! It's about practsing "real life", in preparation for your future. It's about practising to say "NO, this is not what I want", "No, this is a mistake" "No, it's a wrong choice, but at least I tried, and I've found out that I didn't like it" and say to yourself "Now, what can I do next?"

It's about "Not having to put up with unhappiness" and DO something about it. Not just moan and bitch and complain and grudgingly accept it and say "Life's tough but that's life" !!!

Now, unschooling for us is about trying many different things, until we find the things we liked enough to incorporate into our lives, for keeps, for real. And should we outgrown it sometime later, so be it, because it's only natural, and it's OK TO CHANGE!! It's about learning to live harmoniously with other people, naturally your parents and friends will be your first.

So back to my question. Am I fooling myself by wrapping ourselves in these friendly unschooling bubble?

No, not at all. Infact I'm really happy that I've put such a big divide between that horrible, harsh world and my child's world. I feel all those negativity is so unnessecary and un-relevant to our world. Yes, negativity exist, evil exist, hardship exist, unhappiness exist and many more bad feelings exist- I'm not denying it. But what I'm saying is, I don't have to invite it into my child's world, not now, as I'm sure all these factors will naturally flow into his life as he grows older, and venture out into the world. Does this means my child won't be able to face such negative reality? I don't know, but I do know that there's a high chance my child will be able to extricate himself out of any uncomfortable situation, if he wants to. Life's to short to be fighting every battle.

What I am saying is it's so ridiculous that all these parents thinks that it better for their child to be immerse into all the negative feelings, in order to give them immunity to future hardship? Well, if that's the case, why don't we just sent them into military camp, for military training, considering the world now is so full of war and terrorist.

There's no reason for any children to grow up, having to put up wth all these bullying, of not having the chance to develop respect for themselves and others. Of having to accept they are defenseless and therefore unable to change it. No wonder all these children grows up being angry and nasty. Guess where they're learning it from. Yes, I'm really glad I've wrap us both up in this lovely bubble and can swish ourselves away from any horrible situation that we don't like, if we can help it. It's not about not wanting to face reality, It's about being able to make that decision to say NO when it's too much to handle!

If I'm helping my son to channel all his energy into building a more positive, happy self, rather than waste all those energy, trying to heal his broken heart and build more defenses, because some kid is being angry and mean and is taking his frustration out on my kid by calling him stupid or "stinky", my son might just have so much love left over, enough to share with others.

A very evident case based on Halloween trick and treating 2 nights ago. Son and 9 yr old friend went trick and treating, with just 1 bag. The agreement was they will split the goodies among themselves later. My son has already pointed out that he doesn't like chocolate, so the friend can have all the chocolates collected. When they were dviding up the loot, the friend ended up with more, as there were more chocolates than sweets. The friend was so adamant that my son should have the equal number of items. But my kid didn't like the chocolates. So this kid ended up giving my son all his non-chocolate sweets, so that they can equal out the amount. In the end, the number still didn't balance out, the friend was beginning to get upset. My kid just stated "It's ok Jack. It doesn't really matter anyway. I'm happy with what I've got and I don't need anymore. BUt you can share some of these, since you've given me all of your chewies, and now you have non!" And they happily did just that, chewing thru my son's share of chewies and boiled sweets!

See what I mean? Harmony + Love = Sharing. In return, you'll get respect.

Wednesday 24 October 2007

It's a Mathe-Magical Moment....!

In following up from Jnr's game invention last week, combining elements from his Toon Town and PS2 Star Wars Lego game. With me as a scribe, and him, the mastermind, this exercise has now culminate to a very impressive game, set out into 4 parts. Every part consist of X number of droids to eliminate, in order to gain the rewards of various part of a metal suit. This a full metal body suit is necessary as a disguise to enter the enemies headquarters.

It is very enlightening to see all our months of PS2 and computer coming together in the form of an elaborate story-telling game.

Jnr has also been digging out his Lego Knight's Kingdom bits for imaginary play.

And he's been counting. Somehow, he seems to see relation between numbers and Lego and droid killings and parts of metal body suit.

For every action, there's a re-action!

Well, to me, it's always the same pattern emerging. Whether it's tv or pc or toys. The grass is always greener on the other side.
And I think this is what happens here.

I think because DS was always too busy with his electronic media that he doesn't have time to play with any of his toys, that so much so when he's in someone else's home, he's binging on thier toys. Just as any kids whose home either have no tv or is allowed very limited tv time, will naturally binge on our tv. Of which the parents is very quick to cite this situation as an example why they don't allow tv, as the kid will get stuck to the screen.

As for doing everything they are not allowed to, well DS's friends (my kid's 7 and these friends are 9 and 10 and been to Steiner school and is now HEing) who seems to think it's cool to say all those bad words (because they were not allow to say them when they were at thier home), needless to say my son follow suit until I pointed out what he was doing and leave it to him to decide how he should behave. After a while of glorious swearing, the fun's ran out and son's decided that those words were rude and is "not nice" (Direct result of our many discussions while playing Grand Theft Auto, with many "translation" what those swear words meant). He has since taken to remind his friends not to say it, as there is no reason to (well, for DS yes-no reason for it, but for his friends, I believe they are expelling thier frustration of being clamp-dowm (or up, should I say) most of the time, so hence the need for such "verbal detox". Again, swearing give them a sense of control and power over thier lives, because for a short while, they are able to say and do what they are normally not allowed, it's called re-action, or for a better word "rebellion"! A very loud and liberating feeling for them, but not so for my poor ears!

These same boys will get stuck infront of the PS2 the minute they arrive, playing alot of the 15+ games that they are normally not allowed, and will try very hard to get my son to convince me to allow them to play with the couple "18+ games that they are most definetely not allowed" that I've put out of reach. My answer is always "Call your mum, if she says yes, then it's yes with me" and as always, it never went pass that stage. However when my son's turn to go to thier house, my son is not interested in thier Xbox at all (understandable as they only have 2 games, a racing game and a skateboarding one, both of which my son have no interest in). He prefer to play with thier toy.


As for doing everything they are not allowed to, well DS's friends (my kid's 7 and these friends are 9 and 10 and been to Steiner school and is now HEing) who seems to think it's cool to say all those bad words (because they were not allow to say them when they were at thier home), needless to say my son follow suit until I pointed out what he was doing and leave it to him to decide how he should behave. After a while of glorious swearing, the fun's ran out and son's decided that those words were rude and is "not nice" (Direct result of our many discussions while playing Grand Theft Auto, with many "translation" what those swear words meant). He has since taken to remind his friends not to say it, as there is no reason to (well, for DS yes-no reason for it, but for his friends, I believe they are expelling thier frustration of being clamp-dowm (or up, should I say) most of the time, so hence the need for such "verbal detox". Again, swearing give them a sense of control and power over thier lives, because for a short while, they are able to say and do what they are normally not allowed, it's called re-action, or for a better word "rebellion"! A very loud and liberating feeling for them, but not so for my poor ears!

Tuesday 23 October 2007

I'll say....not enough days away from those electronic pixels!!!

I have to admit that I do worry about Jnr straining his eyes, due to too long hours of staring at the computer screen. Which is why I do constantly seek out outdoor activities that he can do, for a bit of fresh air and exercise. And little things that we can do indoors too, which unfortunately is not many, as he is always not interested. So I have to say I am relieved to see him dragged out his box of 3D Star Wars puzzle in the shape of Dart Vader head, and started working on it. So far, we've managed to complete the 2nd stage this puzzle this evening. Over the weekend, Jnr and Papa Gecko's managed to put together a science kit that I've bought - an electric pulley, which was fantastic as that got Jnr playing with it for a few hours. Hurray!

In the last 3 weeks, we've gone swimming twice, and participated in den buidling in the heathland near us which was quite nice as that got us out in the nature for a good 4 hours. Jnr did his 2 session of skiing on consecutive Saturdays. Last week, we went for a movie called Flush Away and spend the whole of the next day in the city, window shopping. And this week, we went mushrooming with Professor Fungus at Alice Holt Park. It was a beautiful day with lots of sun and we ended up spending the whole day running and climbing around the park. And tomorrow, we're going for a Roald Dahl's play. So, we're only clocking an average of 2 "non electronic activity" day, within a very active electronic medium- filled week. This can be quite worrying, especially now that the cold weather is setting in. Mama Gecko's brain need to be ticking....busy thinking up some more activities to distract Jnr away from those very attractive and addictive pixels!

Don’t Bother Me Mom – I’m Learning by Marc Prensky

Another book to my collection.

"The POSITIVE Guide for Parents Concerned About Their Kids' Video and Computer Game Playing "Marc knows it all depends on how we use our games. He knows that if parents place good video games into a learning system in their homes they can reap major benefits for their children and themselves. They can accelerate their children's language and cognitive growth." -James Paul Gee, Tashia Mogridge Professor of Reading, University of Wisconsin-Madison

Marc Prensky presents the case-profoundly counter-cultural but true nevertheless-that video and computer game playing, within limits, is actually very beneficial to today's "Digital Native" kids, who are using them to prepare themselves for life in the 21st century. The reason kids are so attracted to these games, Prensky says, is that they are learning about important "future" things, from collaboration, to prudent risk taking, to strategy formulation and execution, to complex moral and ethical decisions. Prensky's arguments are backed up by university PhD's studying not just violence, but games in their totality., as well as studies of gamers who have become successful corporate workers, entrepreneurs, leaders, doctors, lawyers, scientists and other professionals. Because most adults (including the critics) can't play the modern complex games themselves (and discount the opinions of the kids who do play them) they rely on secondhand sources of information, most of whom are sadly misinformed about both the putative harm and the true benefits of game-playing. This book is the antidote to those misinformed, bombastic sources, in the press and elsewhere. Full of common sense and practical information, it provides parents with a large number of techniques approaches they can use-both over time and right away-to improve both their understanding of games and their relationships with their kids. "

To see other people's opinion
http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Bother-Me-Mom-Im-Learning/dp/1557788588

Monday 15 October 2007

A Surprising Math Moment..!

I have to confess that as unschooling as I can be or aspiring to be, I do have moments that I do panic and start questioning my own wisdom in encouraging and revelling in this laissez-faire approach to learning anything and everthing that's in no way resembles a school curriculum. Hence, I would say we are unschooling extremely well, because I'm panicking now! We're learning alot of general knowledge stuff predominantly science or history or engineering based, touching abit here, skimming abit there, sometimes we just dive in deep and mull over it. But we're nowhere near any maths or writing or spelling.

But all of the sudden, out of Jnr's current obsession with Disney Toon Town, Jnr was asking and initiated discussions on numbers. Like him exclaming to me that 4+4+2 is the same as 8+2. Or him asking how much will 8 x 10 makes, which got us discussing how everything that's "x 10" always have an extra 0 behind it. Discussion then led to understanding the concept of maths - addition means to increase; minus means to decrease; x means to magnified and division meant to separate. And how when you times everything with zero, it alway zero the sum, no matter how complicated or long that sum is!

At the moment I'm having a fantastic time watching and playing with my son. He's imposed his Disney Toon Task game and rules onto his PS2 Star Wars Lego game. Instead of defeating Cogs, he's defeating x-number of droids in order to get the parts of the disguised suits he needs. And he's making up rules as he's going along this game!

Fascinating! He's just drew 20 circles representing "merits" he needs to get on his note book and told me that for every droid he kills, it's 5 merits, hence he's to destroy 4 droids in order to get all 20 merits! Multiplication LOL!

Unschooling Article by New York University, Journalism Dept

Endless Summer
Unschooling is a radical branch of home-schooling where kids control what and when they learn -- free of teachers, schedules and tests. Unschoolers say it's intellectually empowering. Critics call it irresponsible.
By Sarah Karnasiewicz

Celine Joiris has never failed a test. Never eaten crappy cafeteria food. Never been picked last during gym. It’s not that she’s a supernaturally lucky 16-year-old — she’s simply never been to school. “I like the idea of studying, but school is just like incarceration,” she explains. Her brother Julian, 17, agrees. “My approach is, planning, schedules — OK. Tests, OK. College, OK. Whatever. But I don’t really want to think much about it,” he shrugs. “I can’t tell you where I’ll be in two years.”

What’s that? A smart 17-year-old without a plan? A bright, middle-class teenager who’s not stressing out about SATs and admissions essays? In an era when college prep begins in preschool and adolescents need Palm Pilots to manage their after-school activities, such nonchalance has the power to shock. What about all those stories about home-schooled kids dominating national spelling bees and hogging spots at Harvard? Surely “whatever” is not in their vocabulary.

But Celine and Julian Joiris are not your typical home-schoolers — they are unschoolers, followers of a radical approach to education that rejects not just the routines of traditional school, but the authoritative ideology it represents. Unschoolers make up approximately 5 to 10 percent of all home-schoolers. They learn without teachers, curricula or exams; rather, their whole lives are laboratories in which skills and smarts are acquired piecemeal, through casual interaction with the world around them.

In the last decade, the number of Americans who home-school has surged at a rate of 29 percent a year, to include more than 1.1 million adherents nationwide, according to the National Center for Education Statistics. But as their ranks have swelled and the movement has become more accepted, some of the contrarian ideals that once made it revolutionary have been diluted. Though there remain some real religious and ideological differences between traditional students and home-schoolers, on a practical level, at least, life for many home-schoolers bears a similarity to that of their public school counterparts. They work in online classes and with prepackaged curricula. They have tutors and field trips. They compete with one another over who has the most impressive internship and collect offers of admission from elite universities.

“When you buy a curriculum and set your kids down five days a week, except in the summer, all you’re doing is playing school at home,” says Sandra Dodd, a mother of three unschooled children from Albuquerque, N.M., and an outspoken unschooling advocate. “Most home-schoolers, especially Christian home-schoolers, believe that schools are too liberal and too lax,” she explains. “On the other hand, unschoolers believe that schools are too inflexible. Our objections to school are 180 degrees apart from their objections. And so we are not only not on the same team, but school is actually closer to what they’re doing than we are.”

Since 1960, when A.S. Neill published “Summerhill,” a chronicle of life at his “free-learning” British boarding school, and American educational reformer John Holt coined the phrase “un-schooling” in his books of the late 1970s, the philosophy has emerged as the rebellious twin of the home-schooling movement. While paired in many people’s minds, the two have distinct agendas and ideologies. “It is a distinction that is as old as the home-school movement itself, and is an artifact of the fact the movement grew out of both the alternative school movement of the 1970s and the Christian day school movement,” explains Mitchell Stevens, professor of humanities and social sciences at New York University, and author of a definitive study of contemporary home-schooling. “And those distinctions reflect a larger tension in American culture in differences as to how we should raise our kids.”

Indeed, while it is largely unschoolers’ laissez-faire approach to learning that shocks the uninitiated, the most radical aspect of unschooling may not be the manner in which it approaches education, but the way it challenges parents to reimagine childhood. In “How Children Learn,” published in 1967, John Holt wrote: “All I am saying is … trust children. Nothing could be more simple — or more difficult. Difficult, because to trust children we must trust ourselves — and most of us were taught as children that we could not be trusted.” Thirty years later, the belief that children are essentially capable creatures — curious, independent and resilient — is still at the heart of unschooling.

But since Holt wrote those words, American parenting has undergone a tectonic shift. “Good” parenting now seems to be a skill rather than an instinct, something learned not from trial and error, but from self-help authors, life coaches, psychologists, consultants and parenting experts. Whether it is “The Baby Whisperer” pledging to “solve all [parents’] problems,” or Dr. Phil McGraw promising a “step-by-step plan for creating a phenomenal family,” the prevailing sense is that the world is a demanding, dangerous place, tamed only by discipline and determined planning.

For parents fed up with the micromanagement of their children’s lives, unschooling appeals because it disregards conventional wisdom about giftedness, age-appropriate learning, and competition. “There is a sense that the kind of intensive parenting we see increasingly among upper-middle-class families is something that is driving a large portion of people crazy … and unschooling can be read as a kind of dissent toward that hyper organization,” says Stevens. “So while in some ways it can be just as intensive as other approaches, at least it’s on your own terms, and on your turf, and you’re not beholden to the half-dozen organized activities you’ve enlisted your child in.”

Despite the revolutionary tenor of their ideas, unschoolers claim they aren’t zealots. Advocates insist that unschooling produces creative, unconventional kids, but even they acknowledge that such a life is not for everyone. Combing the Web, on message boards like the one at www.unschooling.com, it is not rare to see a message from a mother who writes, “My son is 10 years old and has been doing the unschooling method. His reading is advanced [but he’s] struggling in math. I’m starting to worry he’s learning nothing.”

Laurie Chancey, now 25, was entirely unschooled until college — and remembers how frightening the early years felt for her and her mother, Valerie Fitzenreiter. Living in rural Louisiana, they were true renegades, cut off from a larger unschooling network that exists on the coasts and under relentless criticism from family and neighbors. When Laurie was 6, a relative turned her in to the truancy board, prompting a series of threatening phone calls and angry letters. But Valerie, who went on to write an influential book about their experience, “The Unprocessed Child,” remained unwavering. “Mom had been so bored in school and after reading ‘Summerhill,’ she decided she would unschool me before I was even born. It was amazing, but she just had this complete faith that I would learn what I needed to learn when I needed to learn it, in the face of everyone’s opposition,” says Laurie. “Finally, when I started to reach my mid-teens, other people could see that I wasn’t an idiot and I’d be OK.”

“I admit, when we started this 20 years ago, we were just a bunch of radicals on the Lower East Side — writers, artists and musicians — who thought that we knew our children better than the public schools,” says Francoise Joiris, Celine and Julian’s mother. But over time, she says, her motivations have taken on deeply personal meaning. “My father was a professor and often took me out of school to travel with him,” she explains. Once, when they were living in Virginia, he volunteered to teach her classmates history at their home when the local teachers went on strike. “That experience was amazing,” remembers Francoise. “And by the end, not one kid wanted to go back to school.”

As a mother, she has tried to approach her own children’s education with the same joy and freedom. “When we were little, we did a lot of workshops with friends,” recalls Julian. “One friend’s mother was a doctor and she would have a group of us over a few times a week to talk about science. The next year, she gave a Shakespeare workshop, and we read plays, acted them out, and made our own costumes.” As small children, they often tagged along with their mother while she worked as a dog trainer for films and television. (Now Celine is herself an accomplished dog trainer and frequently competes in canine agility trials with Francoise and their two Norfolk terriers, Stamp and Fleet.)

Their days at home were loose and unstructured, filled with hours reading on the living room futon or playing homemade quiz games about Greek mythology and geography, calling off nations from a map. While occasionally Francoise nudged them in a certain direction, by suggesting a book or an activity they might enjoy, in the end she felt it was important that Celine and Julian call the shots. Since entering adolescence, both have been entirely in charge of their own schedules, attending tai chi classes twice a week and volunteering part-time as antiwar activists. Julian, a devoted member of the New York Assembly of the Society for Young Magicians, performs regularly around the city for other home-schooling groups. Still, both admit that some weeks pass in a blur, without anything to show for the hours. “There are times that I’ll spend a bunch of days hanging around the house, bored,” says Celine. “Then I start to feel guilty! .”

Indeed, despite her idealism, Francoise doesn’t pretend her family has found utopia. Though they have been at it for 16 years, even Celine and Julian’s father, Chris, a painter-turned-architect who didn’t want to be interviewed, has had a hard time embracing the unpredictability of his children’s future. “He supports it,” says Francoise, “but I don’t think there’s one of us that hasn’t at some point worried, what if my child still isn’t reading at age 15?” In the end it often comes down to the strength of parents’ convictions. “The real problem most people have,” says Francoise, her face serious, “is that doing this requires too much faith in kids, too much work on the parents’ part — and no guarantees.”

For all its iconoclasm, and to the chagrin of some critics, unschooling is entirely legal. Every state has a set of standards that govern home-schooling, and which unschoolers must also obey — though their interpretations of those guidelines are sometimes rather loose. But because levels of oversight differ enormously from state to state, it happens to be far easier to unschool in Oregon than in Pennsylvania. In New Mexico, Sandra Dodd has been able to unschool her three children from birth through their teen years, with little interference from the state. When her daughter Laurie was 11, Valerie Fitzenreiter discovered she could register with the Louisiana Board of Education as a “private school” and never reported in again.

In contrast, in New York, where the Joirises live, families submit an IHIP (individualized home instruction plan) each summer outlining the material they expect to cover in the coming months. New Yorkers also face periodic standards tests: every other year before the 4th grade, and annually after that. But for the Joiris family, at least, unschooling’s unorthodox methods seem not to have been an academic handicap.”The exams were never as scary as I expected,” remembers Julian. “In seventh grade, he refused to study any math, and I was terrified he wouldn’t pass,” says Francoise. “But after Julian took the test, he said, ‘It was fine. I only got one wrong.’ And he was right; he did.”

After talking to a dozen unschooling families and studying their blogs and message boards, I’ve found countless similar tales of sucess. But outside that small circle, even among liberal home-schoolers, unschooling still provokes uneasiness. Gail Paquette, a home-schooling mother of two and the founder of the Web site Hometaught.com, is one of unschooling’s most vocal critics. “A child-led approach may develop the child’s strengths but does nothing to develop his weaknesses and broaden his horizons,” she writes. “I [mostly] disagree with the premise that children can teach themselves what they want to learn, when (and if) they want to learn it. Certainly children do learn some things on their own, but their often roundabout way of going at learning is not necessarily the best way.”

Indeed, given the temptations and distractions of everyday life, is it unreasonable to wonder how much kids can really learn when just left up to their own devices? Conventional wisdom tells us that when not compelled to study the basics of reading and writing and arithmetic, the average kid will fritter away the day playing video games and flipping TV stations. And while unschoolers argue that that is an unfairly pessimistic take on children’s curiosity and innate abilities, it would be hard for them to deny that their approach can lead to the acquisition of idiosyncratic skills. When she went off to her freshman year in college, Laurie Chancey was already a gifted computer programmer — but struggled to get through a class in remedial math.

She is hardly alone. Dependent as it is on the changeable passions of a child, unschooling is replete with 10-year-olds who can explain the subtle differences between the Mesozoic and Paleozoic eras but can’t complete a multiplication table. In a make-or-break world where kids are measured by advanced-placement credits and varsity letters, if an interest can’t be showcased on a résumé, is it a waste of time?

“Kids in traditional school spend a whole lot of time learning penmanship, and things like that don’t really matter in the long run,” counters Chancey, who is on her way to earning a Ph.D. in sociology from Louisiana State University. “I know it scares a lot of people to think of divorcing from the school system entirely, and lord knows, people have all sorts of odd reactions when I tell them about my background. But luckily, in my case, I’m succeeding in a very traditional way, so it’s easy for me to say, ‘Look at me, I did OK. This can’t be all bad.’”

So while unschoolers aren’t groomed their whole lives for Ivy League admissions, that doesn’t mean they won’t end up there anyway. Celine Joiris has been working as a volunteer at New York’s War Resisters League and hopes to live and work in Paris for a few years before applying to Harvard. Julian has no immediate plans for college, but continues to study the concert violin and has steadily been attracting gigs as a magician. Somehow, without a battery of grades and tests to prove it, these kids know they are smart. Without their parents providing a map, they feel ready for the future. “As we get older, I think things are going to get less complicated,” says Celine, with just a flicker of a smile. “I mean, at some point, people stop asking what grade you’re in.”

http://journalism.nyu.edu/portfolio/bestof/2005/001877.html

Friday 12 October 2007

MamaGecko's having a wobbly moment..!!!???

I feeling like I'm being too complacent and that we're not really learning! So here goes... this is what we've been doing so far....

Science

* Earth and it's core
* Earthquake and fault lines
* Re-producation in living things
* Clasification of plants - mosses, ferns, flowering and non-flowering plants
* Why leaves are green?
* Light and re-fraction
* Light discussions about atom and molecules in water and solid.

Math
* Greg's seeing the relation between numbers and addition like 8+2 = 10 = 4 +4 +2
* We're still counting pocket money and spending it
* We're counting jellybeans and cogs in Toon Town
* Fraction(Den building event Greg's decided to cut the fungus he found into quarters)
* Still working on time telling

History
* We've drop our intial interest on ancient civilization. We went from hunters and gatherers to as far as Ancient Eygpt and it kinda stop there.
* Mayan/ Chewing gum tree

Geography
* Countries on the equator line is hot.
* Different time line

Spelling is another lovely surprise as Greg's learning to spell more on his own.

Language - Malay coming along really well.

Ski Lessons

Finished Varjak Paw, starting Farthing Wood. Still trying to finish the Myth and Legends book. Perhaps might try to finish the Religion of the World book too.

Tonight I've got the chance to compare my son with his little female "school going" friend. This girl is in Year 2 and we're playing Yatzee. I do not know if the level of Maths she displaying is the level they are teaching in school but she's still having difficulty seeing the relation between numnbers and adition. She was having difficulty addding up simple sums like 5+5+5. And here I am worrying about my son's Maths??!! Me and Jnr are already doing additions on double digits!

GTA Week 8-9

Grand Theft Auto is officially old news now! This week, Gecko Jnr has only been playing 3 hours out of his 7 hours allowance. He stills plays with it but rarely last more than an hour each time.

Thursday 4 October 2007

What are we doing in Sept/ Oct 2007


ICT

Well so far, the pS2 has taken the backseat to Toon Town online but our days are still very much either watching tv (Looney Toons), going online (Toon Town), back to watching tv, maybe some PS2 (only when he's allowed to play GTA).Going out for HEing groups occasionally.


LANGUAGE STUDY

But we've managed to start on our Malay Language lesson, and is making some headway. Unfortunately the Mandarin lessons is not sticking.


MATHS

We're still having some occasional interesting discussion about numbers and Maths from Jnr. Nothing much happening here other than the occasional I Hate Maths pc game that we play together. So base on this, we're still covering add, sub, fraction. Pocket money counting is still going strong.

PE/ SOCIAL
Jnr found a new friend call Jack, so, we seems to be doing alot more outdoor activities together with Jack like swimming, doughnutting down the ski slope, play date and sleep over. Plus Jnr asked for skiing lessons, so he's registered to start this Saturday.Yesterday we went swimming, and today we're going to a indoor play area.

READING
We're still reading many different types of story books. Early this year, we're kinda started on human history type of books, did abit of the Story of the World, started Varjak Paw (still struggling to finish it, because one night, after Jnr fell asleep, I've actually finshed the story myself, so now, it just seems so boring to be repeating the story to him during bedtime!) We then moved onto Myths and Legends type of stories for a very short period. So far, only managed to complete The Arabian 1001 Nights. But last night, we've started on this book called 1000 Questions, which is proving to be not only factual, but also fascinating. Very science based topics, which is convienenient because we're covering science topics like Photosysthesis and catagories of animals, about the moon and stars, subjects that I've been meaning to cover.

GTA Week 5-7

We have managed to settle into a omfortable routine. The idea of having to work for the extra hours seems not interesting enough for Geckno Jnr, hence, he seem quite happy with his allocated 7 hours per week. But this could be due to his fascination with the Disney Toon Town online community. Somehow, I have reasons to believe GTA has just been de-moted to the backseat. Gecko Jnr still plays with GTA but not so hooked on it like when he first started. The current favourite, like I say is Toon Town, with all it's jellybeans and cogs killing and building rescuing.

Wednesday 19 September 2007

Projects for HEing - Cooking Club

Cooking Club for all ages

I'm really excited because I've found a new friend to share the excitement of forming my little cooking club. We're starting a Home schooling cooking sessions. My idea is to teach something exciting and substancial rather than the usual cookies or chocolate rice crispies. I'm thinking recipes from all cultures. And all recip[es has to be child-friendly in terms of preparing and eating it. It will be great if we can get mothers to each volunteer to teach their favourite recipes.


Project Yateley Common

Another idea of mine has taken off with great success. Yesterday 5 families turn up for our first session presenting A Day in the Life of the Ranger. During the 1 hour walk thru the protected heathland, we very quickly see the potential of working with the ranger for the children's educational benefit. Without due, we've confirmed a one a month arrangement with the ranger, covering subjects ranging from science, maths to history and anything really. Next topic is to be Den Building, highlighting ancient way of life as hunter and gatherers, highlighting also the "mutual beneficial relationship" between the heathland as an important souce for wood, food and shelter and the ancient peoples' role in helping to maintain the heathland.

GTA Week 2 - 4

Since the Timeout 1 ended and Gecko Jnr was handed back his GTA game, all seems to be going pretty well. He very quickly used up his 7 hours allowance, split between Monday (4 hours) and Tuesday (3 hours). And moan about unfairness for the rest of the week. So I suggested that he "earn" some extra hours by doing lessons. Choice of lessons were Mandarin which consist of watching Mandarin languaged movie or cartoons; Malay language which will be looking at any Malay language science, maths or picture dictionary; English which will be doing any worksheets in English. So son very quickly did 1 hour of watching some Mandarin dvd, thus earned his first 1 extra hour on GTA.

However, as I'm writing this is on Day 3 of Week 4, Gecko Jnr's interest in GTA seems to be showing signs of waning. The past few days, it didn't seems to be Gecko Jnr's top priority to switch GTA on first thing in the morning, and he's only been clocking an average of 1 1/2 hours per day, quite fascinating to actually be seeing this transition. He's gone back to his Looney tunes, ToonTown online and Star Wars Droid Factory.

Lessons Gecko Jnr benefitted from GTA? Most certainly he is now very aware of all the bad words one should not be saying, and quite often hears teenagers walking by, spouting all those F words and A words. He very quickly conclude that the person is very rude and bad. Now I believe is time is ripe for him to understand the idea of why saying those words is rude and bad for you.

Saturday 1 September 2007

Project Grand Theft Auto- Day 6

We're still in the middle of GTA Time Out No.1, with 2 more days to go before Gecko Jnr gets his GTA back.

So far, he's accepted his time out contently, never once mentioned it and I do wonder if he will remember about it by next week.

So far since he's been isolated from his GTA, he very rarely touch his PS2. He is more likely to be playing on his online Disney game called Toon Town, or playing outside in the garden, playing with his Lego or watching tv. He is also more talkative and more inquisitive.

So I do wonder if the PS2 do "numbed" his mind and brain when he's on it? I am now considering relocating the GTA-PS2 time to the late afternoon. This way, I get to keep my "inquisitive son" for first half of the day and get to do alot of things, or get out of the house, before i surrender him to the fantasy world.

Hmmm....MamaGecko is wondering if this will work! Me and Papa Gecko is also surfing for an alternative driving game with lots of beautiful sports car, but without the violence.

Project Grand Theft Auto- Day 2

I was lucky enough to have a very kind stepfather. And now that I'm a mother, his parenting thoughts and approaches are very much my bible. My stepdad was a very kind, gentle, quite, calm and fair man. I would like to think I was a "quick thinking and smart kid", but now looking back as a mother, I can easily see myself as being a very rebellious and stubborn teenager, constantly questioning anybody or anything. It's a shame i never really appreciate him when he was alive. But then I was just 17, anxious to break away from home. And when he passed away from cancer, I was only 19, in the middle of revelling in my new found independance. I was having too much fun to even think about home! It's sad to think that it is only now I'm beginning to realised what a great person he is, and appreciate him as an individual and not as my stepfather, and how deeply his wisdom has influenced me. I only wish I'm able to thank him now and tell him I how grateful I am, knowing how much he cared for me.

So here's what influenced my thoughts as a parent now.

Dad's parenting skill No.1
"Play fair, let them have the freedom to deciding which and what rules and regulation applies"

Dad's parenting skill No.2
"Now, give them enough rope to hang themselves".

"And they will learn to be true to themselves, and is therefore able to negotiate better compromise between us parents's expectation and their needs for themselves, and is then willing to abide and learn by their own mistakes, and subsequently be a wiser individual."

So needless to say, we're in Day Two and Gecko Jnr has broke the rule of "only playing with GTA when mummy or daddy is with you" by sneaking downstairs early this morning and started playing GTA all on his own. Plus he was also being deceptive by shutting my bedroom door so as to not wake me (which he'll normally do everyday without fail), and turning the tv volume really low so he obviously really didn't want me to wake up, because if I did, he'll have to have breakfast first before
even get to go near the PS2.

So Time Out No.1 is currently being served for a week.

Sunday 26 August 2007

Project Grand Theft Auto- Day 1

The GTA game didn't work so Papa Gecko and son had to go back to town today to exchange it for another. But what surprised me was Gecko Jnr was quite happy and content to continue waiting for the chance to play on this long awaited game. He didn't even get upset when the cd wouldn't load up! He very nonchanlantly moved onto his other 2 new games, Barnyard and DragonBall (we bought him these "buy 2 get 3rd free pre-owned promotion"). So today, son ventured out to town with Papa Gecko, for an exchange. And when they got home, Papa fixed lunch before joining son on sofa for a game of GTA. Needless to say, with all those scurrying through and fro between the tv room and the computer room for online cheat codes, very soon 1 hour is up and son had a meltdown! When informed of the hours being up, son abruptly switch off PS2 and scuttled off upstairs, claiming he wants to do some "thinking". Muffled crying sounds can be heard soon after. Five minutes later, Gecko Jnr demands Mama Gecko, for a consult! Post games discussion was held, with acknowlegement that 1 hour is too short to accomodate all those walking between tv room and computer room (we live in an end terrace!) to surf for online cheat codes, and not enough time for playing. So, new time management is introduced, and agreed upon. Because Gecko Jnr is allocated 1 hour per day x 7 days = 7 hours, he's allowed full authority in allocating number of hours per day. Of which, he then proceed downstairs to write his new timetable for GTA as such.

Sun - 2 hours
Mon - 2 hours
Tues - 0
Wed - 0
Thurs- 1 hour
Fri - 1 hour
Sat - 1 hour

And because he's decide to stop playing 10 minute short of an hour today, Gecko Jnr concluded this gives him 2 hours and 10 minutes tomorrow (Monday)

I'm thinking, perhaps good lessons can be derive from this socially incorrect game. Just 2 days ago, we did a mathematical division exercise, trying to work out how long a 7 years old should play on GTA, considering that an 18 years old would probably only play an average of 4 hours, after school till dinner time. As for bad language, we all have fun making up alternative swear words for him to use, like instead of A**H***, we using Diaper Face and Bum Wipe! Instead of "What the heck", we're saying "What the donkey"! This is how I see it. Gecko Jnr only need some words to express his frustration when playing the game, and he doesn't really care what words he's using anyway, so substituition was easy. And lets all admit it, we adults swear too in times of frustrations! It's just life, sn't it?

Project Grand Theft Auto - Am I doing the rght thing???!!

Yesterday I nearly changed my mind about allowing Gecko Jnr to have his GTA game. The night before, he playfully 'play pretend' to stab me with his plastic knife!!!! And of course during the course of the day, on 2 occassions, he said 2 swear words- F*** and Ass****! Needless to say I couldn't sleep the night, worrying and wondering and confused, thinking if I really know what I am doing as a positive, mindful, TCS unschooling mum! Anyhow, I've keep poor tired hubby up till 2pm, talking incessantly, comparing the pros and cons, manically surfing the web for more research articles on violent video games and it's effect on children. Needless to say, i still can't get my answers as the balance is still equal with 2 prominent school of thoughts -

Some think it's bad influence:-
http://www.kidsource.com/kidsource/content2/video.games.html
http://culturalpolicy.uchicago.edu/conf2001/papers/walsh.html

Some said there's no concrete evidence linking violence to violent games exposure:- http://www.smh.com.au/news/National/Most-kids-unaffected-by-violent-games/2007/04/01/1175366055463.html.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/4594376.stm

And some articles suggest evidences pointing out that since the introduction of violent video games, the level of violent crimes has drop:-
http://www.avinashv.net/2007/06/23/violence-in-video-games/

Anyhow, eventually hubby managed to convinced me to go to bed, by supplying me with an excellent solution- approach it like a science experiment. A controlled environment whereby son's only to play for a hour a day, and only when chaperone either by mummy or daddy, he can do and say whatever he wants during the game, which is within the tv room. Whatever he wants to do or say, it can be acted out within the tv room, but never, ever outside that room. There will be certain swear words that he's not allowed to say, and of course because we parents are there next to him, this means we can point out the meaning of this bad words, and it's negative social context.

This game comes with a NO Tolerance condition, that is, if he's caught imitating or copying any action or sentences from the game, OUTSIDE the tv room, it'll be a Time Out for the game, which will be banished to the top of the cupboard. He's allowed 20 time outs, of which each will last for 1 week. But the 20th one will be for a year!

I went to bed happy with this solution, but of course when morning comes, I chicken out. Gecko Jnr was up bright and early and bouncing because today was the day he gets to spend his "hard saved" pocket money to buy his "long awaited" ultimate game -Grand Theft Auto! And he's very specific about which one he desire - the Sand Andrea one! He was talking about it non stop and I had to try to break it to him gently that I've changed my mind about allowing this game. At first, he was still bouncing away on his bed, not realising what I was saying. And then, his face turned stunned and he re-iterated what I was saying, in dis-belief. Big tears started to roll! His cries was so devastating that even I started crying, seeing how heart-broken he was. I was totally not expecting this. I was expecting tantrum and some tears, but most definetely not big heart-wrenching sobs, the kind you expect when a pet dies or when a love affair ends.

Anyhow, eventually he calmed down enough to ask for my explaining why i changed my mind. I explained about my worries about him imitating the game, about how we have to constantly remind him to stop copying the game and how we believe this parenting action is not good because it's only natural for a 7 years old to be imitating what they see, because that's how they learn. So i explained how our actions as wise adults, constantly and automatically reprimanding him to stop copying the game, can make him feel like he's a bad boy, which is not something I want, because we know he's not bad but a good and kind and gentle boy. And I explain our concerns about his ability in defferentiating between fantasy and reality.

Now, I have to admit that Gecko Jnr can be quite mature for his age, and is capable of understanding alot of things most of the times. He said he truly understood what we're saying, but then that we're not being fair because it's what we're thinking, and not what he's thinking (his way of saying our decision was biased), and he's offered some opinion on his thoughts and his needs for GTA. So he's managed to convinced me that I should maybe, at least, give him a chance to prove himself.

And we did. Eventually my decision is based on our knowledge of our son's intrisic learning spirit, of how he'll drown himself in his current obsession and eventually detox it out of his system. And also i believe in that Forbidden Fruit teory, of how if we ban this game, we are actually elevating it to that Forbidden Fruit Status. This decision is also made based on the fact i know my son's fascination with this game is primarily due to the various cars he can drive around freely, without any hindrance. The violent bit is really secondary, as he informed me that "it's just a waste of time because you don't get alot of money for that. You'll have to crash cars or do stunts to get alot of money". This is in-line with his current understanding of the power of money, that you can buy lots of things if you have money.

So again, my decision is based on my confidence that my son sees this game as purely just another shooting, crashing, money collecting game, no more violent than his Star Wars Lego or Simpsons game. The only difference is that in GTA, the places and characters is more realistic and graphic, and that the game is so much more complex, with more roads and place to explore. A setting to learn bad social behaviour? Well, for me, most definetely a setting to teach my kid everything that's bad, wrong and evil!

So we ventured out to town to buy his GTA game.

Thursday 23 August 2007

Project Grand Theft Auto

Gecko Junior has decided that he wanted Grand Theft Auto for his birthday. And he's being going on and on about it for ages now. This is because The Grand Theft Auto was the game on my friend's 13 years old teenage son's brand new PSP, last Christmas! And of course Gecko Jnr was only allowed that brief few minutes on it and he's hooked, obsessed with this Forbidden Fruit ever since! Mind you, not exactly something any parent would want to buy a 7 years old......but really I can't see how we can go round this latest obsession of his other than to go with it, let him binge on it and detox it out of his system. Which I think he will. I can only draw faith and confidence from the previous situation whereby he'll be stuck with whatever game of the moment, every waking moment and then one day, he'll just play with it for a few minutes, realised it's boring, get up and switch that PS2 off and wander off in a different direction, looking for something new to do. In all these situations, he always ends up back to his trains and lego men.

So you see, there is a pattern to be seen here and it's always the same. Just like with his first Star Wars movie, his first Lego set, his first train set, his PS2, his first his Lego Star Wars game, and currently, the soon to be ousted Simpsons Game.

So now that I'm speed reading thru Gerrard Jones : Killing Monsters, Why children need Fantasy, Super Heroes, and Make Believe Violence, I have managed to absorb a few advocating pointers, enough to sum up courage to say "Yes, you can buy it when you have enough pocket money, and you're only allowed to play with it, only if either me or daddy is sitting next to you, and that you can only play for 40 minutes"

And since then, it's almost like he's been given the green light, and the binge is already starting. He's surfing YouTube for Grand Theft Auto movies. My son likes to refer to YouTUbe for any of his obsession, it's like him doing his research for his project, which is why I've took to naming this post Project Grand Theft Auto. And also when he gets his game, he'll be "re-searching" the internet for cheat codes!

But this time it's different for me. This is not Lego or trains we're talking about, which he can safely got about it on his own, with me nearby. This is about an age 18+ graded game and this time he'll definitely needs a chaperone. Which is why I'll be batch cooking over the next few weekendz so that I don't have to worry about cooking during the week, and also i'm mentally preparing myself for all those "i don't want to go to the park" behaviour! This means I'll be sitting and watching and playing Grand Theft Auto for the next few months to come too!!

Back to YouTube. I was really surprised that some of these movies is really good, there is one of Lego Grand Theft Auto too, loads of storyline wthout any gory shooting or stabbing, but some is just pure nasty and bloody, makes me wonder what goes thru it's creator's mind. Quite a few is actually all just about cars and driving around. It just seems to me that these young movie makers is using the sceneries, cars, characters and animation to facilitate the story that they want to tell, just like they used Lego men before. And you can tell that they are honing their movie making skill as they progress along. One of the movie we saw this morning was depicting this guy, who made tons of money, showing off his big house with all those little details like expensive paintings, showing off his swimming pool, showing off his massive garden, so huge that he actually got lost in the maze before he found his way to his garage, parked full with lots of sports car. It was like a documentary of some rich and famous but I was really amazed with all the effort and attention paid to details to make this movie a really entertaining one. And of course, my son enjoyed it every bit too, especially when it came to the garage, whereby Gecko Jnr was naming each and every car there was in that garage! From Ferrari to the Lamborghini. So well I can at least understand his need for this game, as the Simpson's selection of cars is quite limiting and his interest in cars just a few weeks ago was limited to our local public carpark. He was asking tons of questions about how do we know which car is which, and we then spend 10 minutes walking round the public carpark, looking at the cars parked there and it's badges.

"But in Grand Theft Auto, you get really really fast cars and they all have spoilers" commented Gecko Jnr.

Need I say more!

Tuesday 14 August 2007

HEing, a pro-active or re-active decision?

This is what I am thinking.

With all theses nasty consultations imposed left, right and centre, and more radio interviews on HE gathering momentum; protraying a more positive image of our secretive and mythical HE world is even more crucial than ever. The public probably think we're all 'middle class' (Tony Mooney's doing!), being delusional in thinking we're educating our children in the best way, when in fact, we're only capable of churning out 'laughable quality'. To anyone who's never been near a living and breathing HE family, we must be like a cult-like community. Exist, but not seen, heard of, but not spoken of. They probably think we have green horns, heads full of snakes(or rather lice), live in labyrinth, and we congregate during the full moon LOL!

And every so often, some lucky 'common' folks get a sighting of such an elusive HE Family and if they'll give their “common mind” a rest, they'll see that we are ordinary people (or rather extra-ordinary, which is what divides us and them), and intelligent (that we are and we shouldn’t be ashamed to advertise it!), who've just decided that we ain't going to follow the pack! That we're straying away because we can see the light! And if they are any smarter, they'll follow suit too!(Last laugh on them??!! Ha Ha Ha!)

Most of the decisions to HE are generally a "re-active one, a last resort, against the school failings". Undeniable fact. But it also seems, it’s a “majority working class” thing, and that also means you don't have much options and brains, according to Mr Mooney, to educate to an acceptable standard, and I’m sure he’s not the only one of this belief! But we know this is not true, as we are aware there are families de-regging their kids from private school. And that a lot of HE parents either have diplomas or a Uni degree and quite a lot of us used to be high income earners. And you don’t become a high income earner by having no brains! Just because we go round in scruff jeans and T shirts doesn’t mean we’re un-educated!

I can't help but think maybe we should start thinking about how to portray HEing in a more pro-active light. Isn’t it possible, that for some of us, HEing is a lifestyle decision instead of a ‘rescue mission’ from school?

Currently with all these - Open University, Internet, etc; HEing is a very viable path to education, and should be highlighted as so. Some of us did made a very Pro-active decision to HE because we want to - not because we're forced to- again should be highlighted as so!

No dis-respect intended here as I’m aware some families really had to, simply because they had no choice. But there are also some families who has chosen to HE simply because they are aware that they are legally allowed to and choose to exercise that right, like my family.

So is HEing really all about re-active decisions ? Are we saying that if the school were any better, we wouldn’t even consider doing homeschooling in the first place? And that should schools get their act back together, we’ll consider sending our children back to school? I’m thinking NO.

Could it not be possible that HEing is a subconcious pro-active decision? That our decision to HE is not an act of desperation but merely just the catalyst of our thoughts and beliefs in how life should be. Especially now when all of us are so aware of positive parenting, organic living, green environment, fresh air and country life – basically just trying to have a more wholesome family life. HEing is just another piece of the jigsaw. When I think back to our decision to de-reg our son, his unhappiness about school served ONLY as the catalyst that helped us cement our beliefs that HE is the only way ahead to provide him with the 'edge' when he grows up (I'm sorry if I'm beginning to sound like a pushy mum now, but I assure you I'm not, I'm more of a mushy mum in reality, but it's an undeniable fact that to get a job nowadays, you have to 'stand out' from the crowd!). This is how me and hubby see it. We Humans went from no education, to self education (HE), from small classrooms, to private schooling for the rich, to mass schooling for every citizen. We believe that education has evolved again and now needs a new direction. And that our decision was not a last resort, but is based on our beliefs that mass education has lost it's effectiveness, so we’ve moved onto a different path. And that our son will benefit greatly from the HE approach through out his life. Even better because it’s a legal alternative.

We're talking of a totally different way of living and educating our children. Call it Holistic, call it New Wave, call it anything but the fact of the matter is, it is a viable way of giving our children a head start, gives them time to grow and develop a confident mind as a foundation, which in turn, an opportunity to shine out from the crowd, not just in the work arena but also in life! Isn't this already obvious with our HEed kids nowadays??!! The mind is a very powerful thing, and a very difficult thing to control, never mind teach it! To make it listen, first you'll have to earn it's respect. You can’t tune it up like a car engine, but you can convince it to bend to your will!

HEing is another viable path, other than mass schooling. As many young parents are now even consciously deciding to not even start playschool, which I suppose is based on their own bad school experience. But it's not that they should be seen as they are afraid for their child, not at all, in fact I can see they've learnt and are now wiser and has the experience to weighed their options properly, and decided that HEing is a more effective choice for their child.

So I’m thinking wouldn't it be a good PR angle to stop focusing on school failings as a common reason to HE but highlight instead that HEing is a viable choice, on it's own merits? (I am thinking far ahead or is it just me being my delusional self?)


I would like to think that our choice for our son is more of a Pro-Active one ,considering that the last school was not a bad school, but rather we didn't want to progress down that path anymore, because it’s not the type of lifestyle he wants. I would say our decision is not a re-active one because we didn't HE because we have no choice. We did have the choice to allow our son to continue school, or if it didn't work out, search for another school or even a private school. But we decided we are going to do even better, we're gonna provide him with his own tailor made education.

So the question is, was your's a Pro-active or Re-active decision?

Monday 13 August 2007

It's a good day to just watch tv!

This will be my first post. I'm actually not too sure if I'm able to maintain this regularly but however, i do realised that this can serve as a very good logbook for all our HEing activity. It'll be interesting to be reading this, one year from now. Plus I did notice I seems to have a bad habit of spending hours replying to just 1 post in some HEing forum. Simply because I would have started my post by responding to their concerns, but somehow ended up rattling on and on and on about something that I've discovered during one of my Eureka moment, and eventually realised I've gone off topic, and will then have to spend the next hour editing down my reply, as accurately as I can! How frustrating!!! So this lead me to thinking, perhaps I should exercise that need of mine, by blogging.

Well, a little bit of introduction to start off with. I'm a 36 years old fulltime mum, HEing soon to be 7 years old son, Gecko Jnr. Son's has been to school but was de-reg after the 1st term of Year One. We're kinda eclectic unschooling, meaning Mama Gecko(me) like the idea of the Classical Education Philosophy, is using that as kinda of rough guideline for our learning, but really I think we're also abit of a radical un-schooling sort of set up, which means lots of child led activities, lots of "Yes, why not" situation; lots and lots of discussion and interaction; watching tv and playing PS2; lots of online games. Lots of story reading which is strictly during bedtimes only, as per Gecko Jnr's preferance. And we are totally writing and workbook free family.

Every now and then, even autonomous me do come across a situation whereby it's SOOoooooo.... difficult to say yes! This is where I then goes on my fact finding mission with loads of reading, loads of posting for help. I then needs to do some ironing, with my old Karrin Allison French cd in the background(somehow, not understanding what she's purring about makes it so calming!) and soon my brain will be thinking! And that Eureka moment will come.

So who knows, maybe somebody, someday might think that some of my philosophy actually does make sense. Like I always say, there's always a method in this HEing madness of ours! We just have to find it!

Thanks for reading.