Tuesday, 21 April 2009

A Brilliantly Written Fairy Tale

For those who's not familiar with the UK Home educator fight to defend thier autonomous rights to educated thier children wihtout any official interference, this easy to digest tale pretty much sums it up.


Many thanks to Renegadeparent for allowing me to post it here.

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15. April 2009 08:00

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin.

Once upon a time, there was a Baroness. When surveying her kingdom of schools and teachers, she came across a small community of parents who had legally opted to retain their independence.

She recognised that the people in question were but a minuscule community within her kingdom, and she paid lip service to their efforts thus far.

"Parents are able, quite rightly, to choose whether they want to educate children at home, and a very small number do. I'm sure, the vast majority do a good job," said she.

But the Baroness did not quite trust them. She could not guarantee their protection from The Unknowable Dangers, and she was concerned that, without her superior knowledge and wisdom, they would never be able to rise to the elevated status of People of The Five Outcomes.

"However, there are concerns that some children are not receiving the education they need. And in some extreme cases, home education could be used as a cover for abuse,” she maintained.

And so she appointed a good man of fine teaching stock, Sir Badman, to undertake a quest to ascertain exactly how untrustworthy, dangerous and out of control these people really were. She named this quest The Review.


"This review will look at whether the right systems are in place that allow local authorities and other agencies to ensure that any concerns about the safety, welfare or education of home educated children are addressed quickly and effectively,” she pronounced.

The righteous Sir Badman was keen to make the ignorant, wayward people (who had elected to educate their children themselves for reasons incomprehensible to him) understand that they had responsibilities as well as rights. He, like the Baroness, wasn’t at all sure that mere parents were capable of raising their own children.

He proclaimed: "Legislation affords every parent the right to choose to educate their child at home but with those rights go responsibilities, not least being to secure a suitable education."

And so Sir Badman was tasked with making recommendations in order that this lost and disenfranchised community could be governed accordingly, For Their Own Good. Because Of The Children. With Non-Negotiable Support. In The Fight Against The Unknowable Dangers.

Preparing the brave and noble adventurer, Sir Martin Ward (deputy of the Realm of School and College Leaders) helped Sir Badman into his armour, chanting The Ancient Song of the Risk Obsessed:

"There have been concerns about a small number of cases where this option has been exercised to the detriment of the child."

And this is how the Review began.

Once Sir Badman and his loyal band followers had been dispatched, the Baroness retired to her chamber to rest.

Responsibility for every single child in the rest of the kingdom weighed heavy on her shoulders, for it was her duty was to ensure that each one be protected from The Unknowable Dangers to become a Person of The Five Outcomes. In concentrating her people’s taxes on a handful of children, whom she knew to be no more at risk than any other child, she began to feel quite faint.

How was she possibly to care for every child, when she was but one Baroness who had delegated parental responsibilities to loveless institutions and bureaucrats, forsaking above all others their actual parents? She paced to and fro, wringing her hands in dismay.

Presently, there was a knock at her chamber door, and a messenger appeared in the door way, clutching a scroll.

“Baroness, baroness, I bring you the news of the kingdom -


The quality of human input is far more important for our children’s learning than the equipment in our schools. The sages are now questioning the wisdom of Building Schools For The Future!

Our children no longer roam the forests and fields, breathing the sweet air, adventuring and exploring. The sages are now questioning the wisdom of attempting to offer full protection from The Unknowable Dangers!


School activities are now so prescribed that teachers are little more than administrators of minutiae and children are little more than empty vessels to be filled with piecemeal knowledge. The sages are now questioning the wisdom of the all-reaching National Curriculum!


The formative years of our children are being jeopardised through substandard nursery care as resources are stretched to breaking point. The sages are questioning the wisdom of pushing extended state provision for such small children!


Your desire to test and instil literacy and numeracy in children before they are all developmentally ready is seriously disrupting primary schools. The sages are questioning the wisdom of schooling at such an early age, demanding more time for play, creative activity and self-directed learning!"

The Baroness took a step backwards and sat down on her bed. No sooner had she done so, there was another, more urgent knock at the door. A messenger burst into the room.

“Baroness, Baroness! I bring you news of the kingdom -


The Teachers in our schools are complaining that they can no longer control our children! They are running riot! They cannot hold a knife and fork, or dress themselves, or express themselves, and they are frequently violent! This destructive behaviour is wasting weeks of school time every year. Even the parents are physically and verbally abusive. They say that that you demand too much from them which they cannot possibly deliver. Relationships with children are deteriorating due to fear, mistrust and discordance. The teachers say similar. They are requesting payment increases in lieu of protection. Social workers are overworked, under-resourced, inadequately trained and stifled by bureaucracy. No-one is clear of their roles and responsibilities. All feel powerless and under attack!”

The Baroness sank backwards, clutching the coverlet in dismay. There was a third knock at the door.

“Baroness, Baroness! I bring you news from the kingdom - your officials have been forced to take unprecedented action to subdue civil unrest...


We have drafted in support from ex-marines, prison officers, bouncers and policemen to patrol our classrooms and maintain order amongst our thuggish children.


We have initiated withdrawal rooms to isolate the worst offenders and protect their peers as far as possible from violence and disruption.


We are jailing those parents who do not ensure that their children attend school regularly.


We are preparing a programme of compulsory service for older children.


We are introducing child protection home inspections for under 5s who are looked after full-time by their parents.*

We expect that these measures will regain some control; but they are indeed costly and not without risk. This escalating situation will, no doubt, continue to have a profound effect on the ability of our children to become People Of The Five Outcomes. It is, however, a price we must be willing to pay.”

The Baroness rolled over and lay face down, a tear trickling down her cheek.

Moments later, there was a quiet knock at the door. A fourth messenger walked quietly over, head bowed.

“Baroness, Baroness, I bring you some news from Sir Badman. He has completed the first part of his quest and wishes you to know the following:


“The community places a high premium on the quality of human interaction. They believe that parents understand and love their own children better than anyone else. Their children roam the fields and forests, breathing in the sweet air, adventuring and exploring. Unencumbered by the demands of school, these children have more hours in the day to pursue diverse areas of learning. Parents are as engaged in the learning process as their children. The ratio of adults to children is remarkably low at all times. Children are able to learn at a developmentally appropriate place, which varies dramatically from child to child. There appears to be plenty of opportunity afforded for play, creative activity and self-directed learning.


But, Baroness, the value of such things cannot be measured. A tangible outcome is often not provided. Many of our boxes remain unticked. There is no consistency of approach. We cannot be sure of equality for every single child. We cannot guarantee that they will be safe. We cannot control everything from top to bottom. The status quo will not remain.”

And the Baroness thought back to the classroom patrols, and the withdrawal rooms, and the jail sentences, and the compulsory service, and the home inspections.

And she gazed upon the Five Outcomes, woven into a richly coloured tapestry that hung from her wall: Be Healthy, Stay Safe, Enjoy and Achieve, Make a Positive Contribution, Achieve Economic Wellbeing.

And she sat, and she stared, but she did not quite see. They were only words, after all.

And then she tossed a coin.

* I made this one up, kind of.